it will come {day 23}

23 Oct

I wrote this poem almost ten years ago now.

It is the only one I still read sometimes. I wrote it about grief, about the months after losing my father. But now I can see more in it, something deeper: the struggle to be allowed to not be okay, to wade my way out of pain slowly but surely. In my own way. In my own time.

Grieving
Christina Tremill

They will leave you
to purge yourself of pain
in lobbies of funeral homes
and clipped lawns of cemeteries.
Three months later,
they will expect you whole.

Ignore them.
Your healing will come
unscheduled
through crumpled tissues,
sudden shivers of awareness,
and midnight reminiscence.
But it will also come
through birdsong in early morning dark,
fresh strawberries’ sweetness,
friends’ breathless laughter.

Your healing will come
unexpected
when you do not find yourself
looking over your shoulder
glimpsing the past
but squinting to see
over the horizon.

This post is part of a series, 31 Days of Healing. Check out Day 1 or the complete list of posts. If you want to follow along, you can also subscribe by email or subscribe in a feed reader. Or “like” the blog on Facebook. (We’re all about options here.) And thanks for reading!

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2 Responses to “it will come {day 23}”

  1. Ginny Campbell October 26, 2012 at 9:07 pm #

    Beautiful.

    • Christina October 27, 2012 at 1:45 pm #

      Thanks, Ginny! Hope you & Paul & the boys are doing well!

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